Livin' & Growin'

So after months of pondering, prayers & lots of reflection I have come to some harsh realities of my life.  If any of you have ever experienced this my heart aches for you.  It is a horrible place to be, so lonely, so empty.  You wonder why you feel this way, why me, why now?  I don't believe there is set answers to these questions.  I think everyone in their life hits road blocks, detours & lost travels.  I thought for a while that it was just life and I had to just deal with it, but I don't believe that is true.

I am the mother of 6 amazing angels.  Yep, 6.  You wonder how I could be lonely, or ever lost, but believe me it happens faster than you think.  Between the demands on you as a mother and a wife, then factor in being a negotiator, a therapist, a taxi driver, and account, a personal assistant and that's just the first half of you day.......................it gets a little overwhelming. 

I am however, immensely blessed with a very large direct & extended family that gives me help when ever I am woman enough to ask for it, which is not that often might I add.  They are the source of so much joy, fun & sometimes stress, but I wouldn't change them for anything.

So the reason for this post is to shed some light in the darkness I have found myself in the last while.  I have prayed, asked, begged & pleaded for help from our Heavenly Father and then yesterday I was talking to my younger but quite a bit wiser little brother and he told me, "Do you think you may be asking the wrong question?"   HUH, what..............I have never thought of it in that way.  So I start to think, "am I asking the wrong question?" 

I can only imagine the Lord sitting up there, wondering when I'm gonna get it???  I can only imagine the frustration he must feel watching me struggle for probably no good reason.  So that being said I changed my question, instead of "WHAT DO I DO?????" I changed my approach last night in my prayers to "Help me understand, embrace, & smile through this hard time in my life!"

Needless to say I felt 10,000% better this morning.  I woke up to nothing out of the ordinary other than I peace.............I quiet feeling in my heart.  I've decided that I don't need to ask the Lord to take away or change my situation, I just need to ask for the strength to smile through it, and LEARN!  Because isn't that what we're here for, to learn, to become better!  We can't do that without trials, & the learning experiences that come with it!

So when you are in a rough spot look at how or what your asking from the Lord, you may be amazed at what a little tweak in your question can do for you!